Katie’s Breastfeeding Journey with Benjamin in NICU

Our journey at St. Mary’s Manchester NICU lasted three months, far longer than we’d initially anticipated. Our son, Benjamin, required surgery the day after he was born due to a gap in his oesophagus, making it impossible for him to feed. While the surgery went well, he contracted a virus a few weeks later, leading to an extended stay. Throughout it all, breastfeeding was incredibly important to me. After a challenging breastfeeding journey with my first child, I was determined to have a different experience this time. Despite Benjamin’s NICU stay, I was committed to exclusively feeding him breast milk, even though he couldn’t feed orally.

Before Benjamin was born, I met with an infant feeding specialist at St. Mary’s who helped me prepare for the NICU experience. She explained what I’d need to do to establish my milk supply without Benjamin being able to create breast milk. She advised me to hand-express within two hours of giving birth and gave me bonding squares, along with detailed information on how to build my supply. I also requested immediate skin-to-skin contact after birth, as long as Benjamin was stable, to help kickstart the bonding and breastfeeding process.

When Benjamin was born, I was able to get that precious skin-to-skin contact, and I began hand-expressing within two hours. From there, I was taken to the NICU, where a nurse patiently guided me through setting up the breast pump and encouraged me to express myself every three hours. I started with a combination of hand-expressing and pumping, storing my colostrum in the NICU freezer until Benjamin could be fed, even if only through a tube.

Expressing every three hours—including throughout the night—was a serious commitment. It wasn’t easy, but I was determined to be consistent. My supply gradually increased, and I was thrilled to see progress. Day three, however, brought an unexpected challenge: my milk came in, and I became extremely engorged. One of the feeding specialists sat with me and tried everything to help with the letdown. In the end, it was old-fashioned cabbage leaves that finally relieved the pressure. It’s funny how sometimes, in a world of advanced technology, an old wives’ remedy can save the day.

I continued my routine, building a freezer stash for Benjamin while he fed through his nasal tube. At one point, I developed mastitis, which was painful and frustrating, but after a course of antibiotics, I was able to keep going. Around a month in, the doctors suggested adding a high-energy formula to help Benjamin gain weight, as he wasn’t progressing quite as quickly as hoped. Although I was reluctant, I eventually agreed to supplement with a small amount of formula, allowing us to provide 75% breast milk and 25% formula.

As Benjamin’s condition improved, feeding specialists worked cautiously with his feeding plan, given his risk of aspiration. The fear was that milk might go down his windpipe and damage his lungs, so to reduce the risk, they recommended adding a thickener to his milk, which meant he would need to be bottle-fed rather than breastfed directly. Although I was disappointed that we couldn’t establish breastfeeding, I was proud that he was receiving my breast milk throughout his NICU stay.

When we finally brought Benjamin home, I had built up a large freezer stash of breast milk. Balancing two children made it challenging to maintain my expressing schedule, and I eventually stopped, but I’m still working through my freezer stash, even now that Benjamin is four and a half months old. Reflecting on it, I feel incredibly proud of my NICU breastfeeding journey. Some moments were particularly tough, like waking up at night in a place far from home and heading to the kitchen in St. Mary’s to sterilise equipment, but I was always certain that I wanted to continue.

Breastfeeding gave me a sense of purpose and a way to care for Benjamin even when I couldn’t hold him. I’ll always be grateful for the NICU team and everyone who supported us, making this journey possible. Through all the challenges, the experience has left me with a deep sense of gratitude and pride.

Katie’s Breastfeeding Journey with Benjamin in NICU